I cannot count the number of times I have walked away from a conversation, replaying it over and over in my head, and thought of different ways that I could have been more effective. I suspect that I am not alone in experiencing the desire to improve the way we navigate important conversations in our lives. This book provides insight into tools that can be used to help, but having a humble attitude and being willing to follow what is shared must be the place you find yourself before reading this book.
The information and direction provided helps the reader sort through matters of the heart when engaging crucial conversations. I learned about what to look for in the behavior, posturing, and tone of voice in others when they do not feel safe opening up about things that are sensitive and can lead to highly charged dialog. How can I help those around me feel safe, so that they will share their deepest thoughts and concerns?
For me, a key concept I have gained is the idea around mastering your own story. When I am considering or engaged in a crucial conversation, I need to be conscience of what I am telling myself. Am I convinced that I am a victim or that the other person is a villain? Is the other person sounding like a victim and portraying me as the villain? How do we work through these stories that we tell ourselves? How do we set aside the fiction of some of the internal dialog we have as we engage in these crucial conversations?
None of this is easy. The difficulties in having crucial conversations is exactly why we can all benefit from the instruction provided in this book. Just because I have now read the book, does not give me a position of being an expert in crucial conversations. Like everything else in life that is worth pursuing, being successful in these conversations takes time, practice, diligence, and realizing that I will only get better if I continue to get up and try again after each time I fail.
This book provides insight for all of us. It is not just for business relationships. The information and instruction will benefit every area of life. No matter who we are, personal relationships and connections are part of our lives. This book shines the light on ways that we can all improve our crucial conversations and thus grow in our important relationships.